The Great Commission Before the Great Commission
Are you familiar with the Great Commission? It’s a foundational passage of Scripture found in Matthew 28:16-20 that records Jesus’ final instructions to His disciples before He ascended into heaven. It’s so important because it outlines one of the most important priorities for parents and grandparents:
Matthew 28:16-20
“16 Now the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain to which Jesus had directed them. 17 And when they saw him they worshiped him, but some doubted. 18 And Jesus came and said to them, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”
The problem
The main imperative of this New Testament passage in Matthew 28:16-20 is to make disciples of Jesus of all nations (literally every ethnicity in the world) by going, baptizing, and teaching. Jesus makes it clear He has all authority in heaven and earth (v. 18), and He makes it clear that He will never abandon us (v. 20) as we seek to obey His instructions. We also see that this is a command of Christ, and therefore any true follower of Jesus should seek to obey Jesus in making disciples of all nations.
Most people read this passage and rightly begin thinking about another man or woman outside of their family that they can disciple. This is a good thing! However, there is a problem within American Christianity embedded into our disciple-making focus: one of the most neglected areas of disciple-making is in the home. While Christian moms and dads should disciple others, God never intended that activity to lead to a neglect of discipleship within the home. Sadly, many children will grow up in Christian homes with little to no intentional discipleship efforts from mom and dad. As research shows, parents are the number one spiritual influence in the lives of their kids and yet many parents are ill-informed and ill-equipped to prioritize the Great Commission in their own homes. I believe this disconnect comes from missing the Great Commission before the Great Commission.
In addition, this same disciple-making imperative applies to all grandparents as well because if your kids have kids, you then have the joy, honor, and obligation to assist in passing on the Christian faith to the next generation!
Whether you’re a parent or a grandparent, you need to embrace and wrestle with the following passages:
Deuteronomy 4:9 - “Only take care, and keep your soul diligently, lest you forget the things that your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. Make them known to your children and your children's children…”
2 Timothy 1:5 - “I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well.”
Psalm 78:1-6 - We will not hide them from their children, but tell to the coming generation the glorious deeds of the Lord, and his might and the wonders that he has done. He established a testimony in Jacob and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers to teach to their children, that the next generation might know them, the children yet unborn, and arise and tell them to their children, so that they should set their hope in God and not forget the works of God,
Let’s take a look at a key passage of Scripture in Deuteronomy 6:1-9
Now this is the commandment—the statutes and the rules—that the Lord your God commanded me to teach you, that you may do them in the land to which you are going over, to possess it, 2 that you may fear the Lord your God, you and your son (parenting) and your son's son (grandparenting), by keeping all his statutes and his commandments, which I command you, all the days of your life, and that your days may be long. 3 Hear therefore, O Israel, and be careful to do them, that it may go well with you, and that you may multiply greatly, as the Lord, the God of your fathers, has promised you, in a land flowing with milk and honey. 4 “Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 5 You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. 6 And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. 7 You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. 8 You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. 9 You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. (emphasis added)
Timeless principles
In this Old Testament passage in Deuteronomy 6:1-9, we see a profound set of instructions from God that was delivered to the nation of Israel through Moses. While the original audience was the nation of Israel, there are a few timeless principles that apply to all Christian parents today:
This passage is a command from God Himself.
The command to disciple children isn’t just limited to parents. God has a spiritual family and has always been building spiritual families to pass on a legacy of faith. Even in the first command to Adam and Eve in Genesis 1:28 includes the idea of the physical multiplication of God’s people carrying within them God’s design and purposes that would spread to the nations.
Parents discipling their children is not optional. (6:1, 6) If kids don’t know the goodness of God, it’s because their parents didn’t teach them the “God-stories” of their own faith and experience along with church history (Deut. 4:9)
God’s instructions include parents passing on their faith to their kids and their grandkids (6:2)
Discipleship in the home should be the natural overflow of parents loving God with all of their heart, soul, mind, and strength. Parents and Grandparents love God, remember His words, and teach them to their kids diligently. (6:4-6)
Parents and grandparents should leverage daily teachable moments for discipling their kids (6:7-9), which implies proximity, consistency, and intentionality.
Conclusion
If this is God’s design for the family, then parents must make take radical measures to ensure they are proactive in their discipleship efforts in the home.
Many parents and grandparents lament the growing influence of culture, society, public education, and peers. They lament when their kids or grandkids “walk away from the faith and the Church”. Ironically, parents (or grandparents) aren’t intentionally passing on a biblical worldview to their kids, teaching them God’s Word, and intentionally showing them how to follow Jesus and walk in the Spirit. Instead, most parents (or grandparents) have ignored and abdicated their God-given responsibility by assuming the local church will raise their kids to be spiritual champions. While the Church is always a supportive supplement, it was never designed by God to be the primary means by which children learn to follow Jesus.
Parents: it’s time to embrace the Great Commission before the Great Commission. It’s time to embrace your God-given calling to disciple your kids in the faith. It’s time to lay aside fear and insecurity and trust the Spirit inside of you and the Word of God given to you in Scripture. God has equipped you with everything you need; your job is to be faithful.
Grandparents: it’s time to embrace the Great Commission before the Great Commission. It’s time to embrace your God-given calling to disciple your grandkids! You likely have a wealth of experience, time, availability, and resources that God has entrusted to you - what better way to spend them than intentionally pouring into the spiritual life of your grandkids. I know there are unique challenges associated with grandparenting, but that doesn’t mean apathy or despair are the right choices. Check out the resources below from Legacy Coalition that will help equip you to overcome the many possible barriers to influencing your grandkids spiritually.
Personal Example
I’ll be the first to admit I’m not an expert on this topic. I don’t have all the answers and I haven’t always done the right things. However, this isn’t just a blog post or a theory for me. I have been intentionally discipling my son since age 2017 when God saved him. In addition to meeting with him every week (one on one at a coffee shop) for Bible study, I do my best to leverage teachable moments each day. We talk about life through the filter of being a follower of Jesus. I ask him questions and challenge his thinking. We serve together. We have fun together. I teach him what the Bible says. We pray together and for each other. I’ve taken him on a mission trip to an unreached people group and we’ve served together. We are actively involved in our local church as a family. I discipline him as best I know how yet remind him of the gospel at the same time. I ask for his forgiveness when I sin against him or when he sees me sin against my wife, my daughter or others. I model for him (imperfectly) what a godly man does and does not do. He sees our family on mission together by having people in our home all the time for dinner, counseling, and building community. All of these things take proximity, intentionality, and consistency. All of these things are costly yet highly rewarding. There is no greater joy than helping my son learn to follow Jesus and cultivate his faith while being in relationship with him. It’s messy, hard, and confusing at times. However, God is faithful to use my imperfect efforts to make a disciple. He will be faithful with you as well!
Suggested Resources
I have a 30-minute video session called Family Discipleship that includes a more detailed explanation of Deuteronomy 6 as well as outlining biblical foundations, biblical expectations, and biblical application for family discipleship. I pray it’s helpful to you!
Parents:
In my effort to be an intentional disciple-maker in my home, the following resources have been very helpful to me. I hope they are encouraging and practical for you as you make disciples in your home for the glory of God!
Family Discipleship: Leading Your Home Through Time, Moments, and Milestones by Matt Chandler
Write it On Their Hearts: Practical Help for Discipling Your Kids by Chris Swain
Family Driven Faith: Doing What it Takes to Raise Sons and Daughters Who Walk with God by Voddie Baucham
Not Consumed - a collection of age-appropriate studies that are grounded in Scripture and provided guided topical studies on a variety of relevant issues for children.
Grandparents:
Your first stop must be the Legacy Coalition. They are leading the way for intentional Christian grandparenting in the United States and across the world!
Grand Monday nights - a free weekly webinar with new guest speakers every week! Video replays available too!
